New
New morning.
New day.
New ideas on yesterday and tomorrow.
New opportunities.
New toy.
Of course, I forgot my cell phone… It truly is a crackberry. Since I have gotten that thing, I have not stopped sending emails, checking maps, making phone calls, playing video games, taking pictures… Pre-Red Bull, I was a complete zombie as I got ready for work today. I was lucid got I saddled up, but not when I walked out of the bedroom this morning.
Anyway.
It was under 60 degrees and overcast when I pulled out of my driveway this morning atop the FJR. The ride to work was mellow and quick. I only waited a one light on my entire ride down Sandy. I had my foot down once on I-84, then speed limit or better the rest of the way through the interchanges, over the bridge, and down I-5 to the office. I’ve even got plenty of fuel for my ride home. Nice.
I finished reading Daemon a couple of nights ago. It rocks. If you like tech or detective stories, you’ll love Daemon. Here are some of the tags associated with on Amazon: technology; thriller; games; book; future; novel; high tech; cyberpunk; fiction; cybernetics; humanity; techno-thriller; ecology; high-tech; mmorpg; morality for nerds; networking; socio-political; wake up call. I started reading the book online through the posted sample chapters. It looked cool so I ordered it through Amazon. (It was available at Powell’s.) Once it showed up I couldn’t put it down. Plowed through the entire book, 444 pages, in three days/nights. I thought about the story while I was at work. I wanted to read Daemon, more than I wanted to prepare for an interview. It is that gripping. (link).
So I started a new book last night. I am reading about the myth of 1950’s American families. My counselor urged me to read the book and suggested another. I struggle with some of the ideal of my society. Being male, I supposed to be the primary bread winner, providing for my family. I am supposed to define myself by my vocation. I am supposed to do a lot of things that are all reflections of some kind of historical ideal. The book is a discuss of those historical ideals. So… As I learn to find a life / work balance and as I learn to be more comfortable within my own skull as I ‘play the game,’ I have to grow. I got up yesterday, put on my interview clothes and went off and did it. I didn’t resent that fact that I had to wear Dockers instead of my usual blue jeans. I didn’t resent the fact that I had to wear a button down shirt instead of my usual black geek/concert t-shirt (Generic Carbon Unit is today’s selection if you are curious.) I have finally learned that if I want to be taken seriously, there are times when I do HAVE to dress the part. I didn’t wear all black, but I didn’t wear white or light blue either. I wore a black shirt and olive pants with black dress shoes. I still don’t wear a watch any more. I still have long hair. I stopped wearing earrings mostly because they get snagged in my helmets and I’m too lazy to deal with the in and out. I guess what I am trying to say is that I am working on it. I am still working to find the best place for me. I think I have made great progress in the last 5 years, all things considered. I am spending time in way that are much more rewarded and enjoyable that I could have imagined back in that old life.
There is still much to do, but I feel it is attainable. It never seemed that way before. It is attainable.
New day.
New reflections on my own past.
New attitude.
New hope?
